fembuck | The Edge (Alice/Bella, Twilight 15/?)

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The Edge (Alice/Bella, Twilight 15/?)

Title: The Edge
Author: Janine
Fandom: Twilight
Pairing: Alice/Bella, mild-Alice/Jasper
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: All characters are owned by Stephanie Meyer. I’m just borrowing them.
Summary: Edward breaks the campaign of silence he had launched against Alice, and the two of them have a much needed talk.

Prologue: Golden Slumber
Part 1: Skating the Edge
Part 2: My Favorite Mistake
Part 3: The Rules of Attraction
Part 4: Shattered
Part 5: Breakin' All The Rules
Part 6: Good World Gone Bad
Part 7: 'Splaining
Part 8: Sway My Way
Part 9: Fuzzy Wuzzy Wonderland
Part 10a: The Honeymooners
Part 10b:The Honeymooners
Part 11: Complications
Part 12: Uh Oh
Part 13: All Falls Down
Part 14 - A Fortunate Confluence of Events

---

The Cullen House

Alice ran the brush through her hair one last time before bringing her hand up to her head to run her fingers through her dark locks, mussing up the hair she had just been combing, returning some of its usual disarray. Satisfied with the effect, she then put the brush down and turned towards the bed.

“Well, what do you think she’ll want to major in?” Jasper asked watching as Alice moved slowly towards the bed and then placed her right knee on the bottom of the mattress before she began to crawl towards him.

“I don’t know,” Alice said, sighing as she reached the headboard and leaned her back up against it, mirroring Jasper’s pose. “She hasn’t made up her mind yet,” she continued frowning a little. “I don’t think she’s given it much thought. Not lately,” she finished softly, knowing that Bella had had her mind set on being turned as soon as possible, and that being a vampire, not a college freshman, had been her post-High School plan of choice.

“Okay,” Jasper said, looking down at the array of brochures littering his lap, studiously focusing on them instead of the wave of frustration and worry that had just emanated from Alice.

Even though Alice was more bubbly and talkative than him, in her own way she was usually very calm. She was fairly unflappable, and tended to take things in stride. He wasn’t used to the seemingly random, and intense brief bursts of emotions that would now come from her. In over fifty years, Jasper had never known anyone effect Alice’s emotions the way Bella did and it left him feeling a little off balance.

“What are her best subjects, then?” he asked, turning to look at Alice, trying to keep his mind focused on something practical.

Alice met his gaze, staring at him for a moment. She then bit her bottom lip and started to blink rapidly, her breath coming out in quick staccato huffs.

“Let me guess…” Jasper said, knowing that Alice was trying very, very hard not to laugh. He had been around her long enough to have developed a very good sense for her humor, and he knew instinctively what she was thinking. “…Biology?” Jasper guessed, lifting a pale eyebrow at her, a little smile beginning to creep across his lips as Alice’s control over her laugher began to slip.

Alice released her bottom lip and laughed, her hand lifting to her mouth to cover it, as she continued to blink, her body shaking as the laugher vibrated through her body. This went on for around thirty seconds, and then she began to regain some control, her bottom lip finding itself ensnared beneath her teeth once more as she looked over at Jasper sheepishly, a mildly embarrassed expression coming to her face.

“English,” Alice said more seriously once she got her fit of giggles under control. “Literature,” she continued resting her head on Jasper’s shoulder. “I don’t think she actually would have studied it before. She probably would have gone with something more practical. But, now there’s no reason for her not to go with what interests her.”

Jasper nodded, his thumb idly tracing the slick covers of the brochures on his lap. He could hear the affection in Alice’s voice, feel it pouring off of her, and again he wondered how he had ever been able to mistake it for friendship alone.

“We don’t have to talk about Bella,” Alice said softly a few seconds later, taking Jasper’s hand in hers and holding it tenderly.

She didn’t have Jasper’s talent for reading emotions, but she had been with him for a very long time, and she knew how to tell how he was feeling. He was trying very hard to be supportive and seem fine with things, but she knew that it was difficult for him; much more difficult than he wanted her to know.

“As a subject she’s somewhat hard to avoid,” Jasper responded quietly, squeezing Alice’s hand gently in his own before he tilted his head down to press a kiss the top of Alice’s.

He knew she was trying to ease his discomfort by switching the subject to something less painful for him, but whether he liked it or not, Bella was now a significant part of Alice’s life, and therefore his as well, and they had to talk about her. He had to get used to hearing Alice talk about her. He had to get used to feeling Alice’s emotions as she talked about her. He needed to hear these things and feel these things in order to be fully able to accept the situation; in order to make reality feel like reality.

Jasper breathed in deeply, as his lips brushed against the top of Alice’s head.

Her hair was still wet from the shower, and she smelled strongly of mango and papaya. She had only called out a few words to him upon arriving home before heading directly to the bathroom, and he knew the lingering bath she had taken had been to wash Bella’s scent off of her.

He breathed in again, and sighed.

The scent of mango and papaya was a reminder in and of itself of how Alice had spent her evening, but he knew that it was far, far preferable to actually smelling Bella on her, and he was glad to have been spared that at least.

“Not true,” Alice said in response, however her voice was soft and lacking strength. “We could talk about…”

“Your evening?” Jasper asked, his voice a little pointed and wary but not cruel.

Alice was quiet for a moment.

“I made up with Charlie,” she said finally, trying to think of something she had done that evening that didn’t involve talking to Bella or rolling around in bed naked with Bella.

“Better,” Jasper said softly, his lips quirking a little. “But still Bella-related,” he continued, his thumb stroking the back of her hand, which was still resting comfortably in his own.

“I found myself singing along to ‘My Humps’ in the car this afternoon,” Alice offered after a few seconds of thought.

Jasper snorted indelicately and the sound making Alice smile. “That’s … so sad,” he murmured, stroking her cheek in a consoling manner.

Alice looked over at him, smiling, and then leaned up, pressing her mouth against his.

“I know,” she sighed before resting her head on his shoulder again. “This decade is ruining me,” she continued piteously.

She straightened up with a sudden excitement and grabbed Jasper’s arm.

“We need to go to Seattle and see Shakespeare performed on stage,” she declared, squeezing his arms, emphasizing the last words because she was beginning to think of Leonardo DiCaprio when she heard the words Romeo and Juliet, and the thought would have made her cry, if she still had working tear-ducts.

“Or at the very least we need to attend the symphony,” Alice went on. “Jazz,” she squeezed his arm again, “the last time I heard Moonlight Sonata it was a techno remix. I cannot continue on like this,” she finished shuddering.

Jasper laughed, his eyes crinkling at the sides in the way Alice loved so much.

“Cultural elitist,” he accused playfully.

“Am not,” Alice muttered immediately, though she really and truly suspected she was.

“Not with diction like that, you aren’t,” Jasper returned, laughing lightly as Alice swatted him in the stomach.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Alice responded smiling as Jasper’s impeccable 19^th century schooling reared its head again. “I meant to say … ‘W-w-why I never!’” she began in an extremely affected southern accent. “‘You sir, have wounded me to the very depths of mah soul. How, I say, how do you sleep at night?”

Jasper laughed again and then looked at Alice in mock horror. “Who talks like that?” he asked, still chuckling.

“Southern ladies from a certain era,” Alice declared as if the answer should have been perfectly obvious. The accent was perfect – even though she hadn’t lived in the south for a long time she could still seamlessly duplicate the twang - but she knew that the language was overwrought.

“Only in badly written romance novels, my dear,” Jasper said smiling.

“See, that’s the problem,” Alice said happily. “Those are my favorite,” she continued pulling back from him so that she could see his face.

Jasper grinned at her, and Alice smiled back, bending her head forward a moment later so that their foreheads were touching. In that position, they continued to hold each others eyes and smile.

“Alice.”

Alice blinked slowly, as if coming out of a fog, and then she and Jasper both turned towards the door of their room.

Alice already knew who she was going to see standing there; her mind had identified the voice even though the warm haze that had descended over her brain, but that didn’t stop her heart from clenching painfully when her eyes landed on Edward, leaning awkwardly against their doorframe.

“Edward,” Alice breathed out, her tone a mixture of hopefulness and surprise. It was the first time he had voluntarily talked to her in two days.

“Do you have a minute?” Edward asked. His tone was slightly strained and he was looking everywhere in the room but at her.

“Yeah,” Alice said, sharing a brief look with Jasper before hopping off of the bed. “Sure.”

“I’ll wait for you downstairs,” Edward said, finally turning towards the bed. He didn’t look at Alice however, he simply allowed his eyes to meet Jasper’s briefly, nodding once to acknowledge Jasper’s presence, his manners not allowing him to leave without doing so, and then he turned and headed out of the room.

Alice moved towards the closet, grabbing a pair of yoga pants to pull on over her boy shorts.

“Any words of wisdom, soldier?” she said softly, turning to look at Jasper from just inside the closet doors.

“If he wants to duel, make sure that you get to choose the weapon,” Jasper responded.

“Thank you,” Alice said making a face at him, frowning slightly when he smiled at her. “That helps a lot,” she continued, reaching behind her to grab a random shirt which she then threw at his head.

That taken care of, Alice then made her way towards the bedroom door … and Edward.

---

Edward was leaning against the base of banister, staring at nothing when Alice reached the main floor of the house. When she came to a stop beside him he didn’t turn around to face her, and Alice found herself looking out into the darkness of the house as well, waiting to see what he would do.

She was in the wrong, and so on the way down she decided that she would follow his cues, allow him to set the pace of the discussion, even though she wanted nothing more than to yell “I’m sorry, I’m sorry” over and over again and throw herself at his feet, begging for forgiveness.

“Feel like a walk?” Edward asked finally, still avoiding her gaze, though his eyes were now facing the front door.

“Yeah,” Alice said softly. “That sounds … yeah,” she said cutting herself off before she could make it sound like they were going for a lovely stroll in the woods. Despite the peace of the outdoors, she was sure there would be nothing ‘nice’ about what was coming, and didn’t want to aggravate him by suggesting otherwise.

Edward gave a terse nod and headed for the door, and sighing deeply, Alice followed.

---

“You saw Bella today?” Edward asked ten minutes into their walk.

“Yeah,” Alice responded, her eyes focused forward.

Edward was silent for a moment.

“Charlie is still fond of you,” he said finally. His voice was a mixture of confusion and irritation.

“Charlie doesn’t worry about me … the same way he worries about you,” Alice responded, knowing that the fact that she was a cute, polite, bubbly girl, who painted his daughter’s toe-nails and got her to listen to obscure sixties music was the reason Charlie was so forgiving with her.

She could be as silly teenage girl at times, but as far as Charlie was concerned she was relatively harmless. Edward however, in Charlie’s mind, was not only a threat to Bella’s chastity, but the cause of all of the disastrous decisions she had made in the past year that had put her in harms way.

Charlie thought that Edward was bad for Bella, whereas he thought that she was good for her, despite certain mistakes she had made that could be written off to youthful carelessness.

Edward snorted unkindly, and Alice said nothing. He was right to really. Out of the two of them, she was the one Charlie should have worried about spending the night. And her actions had hurt Bella just as much as Edward’s had. She was just as deserving as Charlie’s mistrust and dislike, but she was able to come and go freely, while Edward was likely banned from setting foot in the house.

“You knew I was going to see her?” He asked, his head turning minutely in Alice’s direction, before he looked away again.

“I thought you might,” Alice said.

He had been waffling back and forth about whether to see Bella earlier in the day, and she had actually been debating about whether or not she could get away with staying with Bella until she feel asleep, when Edward’s decision to see Bella came to her in a vision and she knew she had to leave.

“And you still couldn’t stay away?” Edward asked, and his tone was harder than it had been before, angry and accusing.

She knew then that despite the ban Charlie had likely placed on him, that Edward had made it into the house, and into Bella’s bedroom. And that while all physical evidence of her time there had been eradicated that her scent would have been easily detectable to Edward, and that he knew exactly how she had spent her time there.

“Honestly,” Alice said softly, still keeping her eyes averted. “No, I couldn’t,” she sighed.

Even before the vision she knew that there was a good chance he would go to see Bella again, but she had been compelled to see Bella as well. Staying away the night before had been hard enough. She couldn’t have gone another day without seeing her.

“Being away from her all those months was torturous,” Alice whispered. “Now that she’s so close … staying away is impossible,” she sighed.

Edward heard her words echoed in her mind, and closed his eyes, severing the unconscious connection he had formed with her.

He didn’t want to be in her mind when they were having this conversation. He didn’t want to feel her love, and affection, and desire for Bella pulsing through him. He didn’t want to sympathize with what she was feeling. He didn’t want to feel the truth of her emotions and acknowledge to hopeless of trying to ignore them.

She was in the wrong. She was the interloper. She should have been the one suffering, not him.

“Your hair was wet,” Edward said, automatically pushing a branch up out of Alice’s way. The action had been automatic, an old gesture of brotherly affection and he wished that he could have taken it back.

“I had just gotten out of the shower,” Alice responded, tempted to thank him but stopping herself, knowing instinctively that it would not be appreciated. He probably hadn’t even meant to do it.

“Oh. Afraid Jasper would try to bite you?” Edward asked; his voice casually cruel.

“He likes to do that sometimes anyway,” Alice replied, not rising to the bait.

“So you just didn’t want him to smell her on you,” Edward said, moving out into a small clearing, his head tilting up to peer at the moon. “You’re very considerate of your cuckold. It’s nice one of us was spared the details of your sordid sex life.”

“Just because I have one, it doesn’t mean it’s sordid,” Alice said, stopping in her tracks to level a glare at Edward.

She parted her lips again as if she was going to say something else, but she thought better of it and was silent for a moment.

“I know you’re … listen, your problem is with me, okay. Leave Jazz out of this,” she said finally, her voice edged with steel as she got to the last part of her statement.

It was one thing if he wanted to take shots at her, she was fair game, but she would not allow him to abuse Jasper in order to punish her.

“That seems to be easy for you to do these days,” Edward responded lowly, his eyes burning into Alice’s. “But I can’t help but care about how my actions affect others,” his words were pointed and cold.

Alice’s body coiled and her lip twitched as she tried to clamp down on the urge to bare her fangs. Her chest rumbled. She glanced out into the darkness, staring at the shadows of the trees, and then began to breathe in and out deeply.

It was too soon, going out there with Edward was a mistake. He wasn’t ready to talk to her. He just wanted to vent his frustrations. And she couldn’t fault him for that, she really couldn’t. His anger was justified. But if she stayed and played into it, things would be said, or actions taken that couldn’t be undone, and things between them might truly be ruined forever. He was her brother, she loved him, and she didn’t want this to be the end of things for them.

“I’m not going to do this Edward,” Alice said, forcing her body into a more relaxed position before turning around. “I’m going back to the house.”

With that she turned and began to walk away, moving a few meters away from him.

She was preparing to take off into a run when his voice reached hers.

“I accepted,” Edward said softly, his eyes fluttering closed as he forced the words past his lips.

When he had gone to Bella he had had no intention of accepting the offer. The idea of sharing the woman he was in love with, the woman he wanted to marry, the woman he had waited a lifetime for, was unthinkable to him. But after he had arrived, when he had begun to talk to her, for the first time he realized how dire the situation really was.

He had been away, Bella had been lonely, and she had always been extremely fond of Alice. He had thought that their relationship had been a matter of convenience, of comfort, and that once he pledged himself to Bella again, and promised not to leave her that the affair with Alice would end.

However, Bella was unwavering in her declaration of love for Alice. She had said that while she was lonely, that the feelings she had for Alice had been there for a very long time, and that they weren’t about to change just because he had come back. When she spoke of Alice, her voice cracked with emotion and her eyes began tear up.

He couldn’t fathom how it had happened, how these feelings between them had arisen, but standing in Bella’s room with Alice’s scent all around him as Bella’s emotions were overwhelmed at the mere mention of Alice’s name, Edward realized that the feelings were very real. He realized that if he didn’t accept the terms Bella had set out that he actually would lose Bella, and he couldn’t risk that.

So he agreed. He hated the situation with every fiber of his being, but he agreed. Because not having Bella at all would be worse.

“What?” Alice breathed out turning around staring at him.

“I accepted her terms,” Edward said, finally meeting Alice’s eyes for the first time in days. “Bella and I, you and Bella, you and Jasper,” he continued, his eyes fluttering closed. “That’s the arrangement, right?”

“You agreed?” Alice asked, surprise colouring her tone. She had thought that he might accept eventually, but she didn’t think that it would be so soon. She had expected to have to fight more, she had expected more conversations like the one they’d been having. It had never entered her mind that he would be so … reasonable.

“Yes,” Edward said looking away again. “Being away from her is impossible for me as well. She made it very clear that the only way we could be together, was if the two of you could be as well, which didn’t leave me with much of a choice,” he continued, speaking slowly through a clenched jaw.

Edward sighed and ran an agitated hand through his hair.

“Do you know what the most difficult thing is?” he asked, turning to look at Alice once more, actually surprised that he was managing to discuss things so calmly.

She shook her head.

“When I picked up your thoughts when you were communicating with Aro, when I realized what had happened between you and Bella … I found that I wasn’t surprised,” he responded, a dark smile twisting his lips. “Hurt? Yes, certainly. Angry? Yes, of course. But shocked? No, I can’t say that I was that at all,” he explained, his face twisting in agony as he spoke. “I think a part of me has known since I delivered your letter to her. She was so distant after that, so broken,” he continued, his voice soft and far away.

In the days after Alice left, before his own departure, Bella hadn’t really been with him. She had gone, retreated to someplace dark, lonely inside of herself. He hadn’t understood it at the time. He hadn’t been able to understand why Alice’s departure had affected Bella so deeply. But when he saw into Alice’s mind, Bella’s reaction and so many other things had finally begun to make sense.

“And then there was you, singing songs in your head every time I was around,” Edward continued, remembering how confused he had been by Alice’s sudden distance. How hurt he had been by her avoidance, “clinging to Jasper with that desperate, beseeching look in your eyes, your every word a plea for forgiveness,” he went on, shaking his head. They had all been so confused by Alice’s guilty behavior when she hadn’t done anything that any of them were aware of. “Wincing whenever someone mentioned her name,” he finished looking away.

He shook his head at the memories, wondering how it had taken him so long to see the truth.

“Edward,” Alice said, wanting to reach out for him, but reining in the impulse. “I never mea …”

“I know, I know,” Edward said holding up his hand. “You never meant for it to happen,” he said, gazing off in the distance again. “I believe you,” he sighed. “I don’t think that you intentionally tried to hurt me … but you did Alice,” he continued meeting her eyes. “You’ve hurt me, tremendously, and … I don’t like you very much right now,” he went on staring at her before he was unable bear the sight of her face. “It’s going to take me a while to forgive you,” he sighed. “We were always the closest,” he whispered, “which makes it all so much more terrible.”

Alice breathed in deeply, and squeezed her eyes shut; only opening them again when she felt Edward’s hand on her shoulder.

“I said some nasty things earlier,” Edward began when Alice opened her eyes. “I shouldn’t have. I was being mean. I wanted to hurt your feelings. I wanted to make you feel badly.”

“I do,” Alice breathed out, looking down at her feet.

“Yes, I know,” Edward said sighing. “I’ve been trying to block it out, but your guilt is a potent force … as is your love,” he continued, his voice pained as if the words were physically harming him. “I may have similarly unpleasant lapses for the next little while, please forgive them if I do,” he went on, breathing in and out deeply.

Alice nodded, uncertain what to say.

“I hate feeling like this,” Edward said, stepping away from Alice, his hands running through his hair again. “I hate being mad at my Little Freak,” he said, the nickname falling effortlessly from his lips. “Familial love is so strong too,” he sighed, gazing over at her before turning away again.

He’d always had a soft spot for Alice, had always been particularly charmed by her, and felt extremely protective of her. He had let his guard down with her, and been open with her in a way that he had never been with his other siblings, even though he loved them dearly as well. There was just a special bond between Alice and he, and being away from her hurt him as well. He never would have been able to contemplate a scenario in which the sight of her made him sick. And yet, now, he could barely stand the sight of her face.

“You can’t stand to look at me, can you?” Alice asked softly, her heart breaking as she saw the truth of the question in every tense inch of his body.

Edward kept his eyes averted, but tilted his head down as if some part of him wished it weren’t true.

“Is it always going to be like this?” Alice asked, biting her bottom lip, trying to keep her voice from breaking.

“I should be the one asking you that, shouldn’t I?” Edward asked looking up towards the twinkling stars.

“I can only see the outcome of decisions once they’ve been made,” Alice murmured, even though she knew Edward was already aware of this.

“Then, at least we know I haven’t decided to hate you forever,” he responded.

“That’s … true,” Alice said haltingly.

She hadn’t thought of it that way, but he was right. If there was really no hope for them, if he had decided to resent her for the rest of their unnaturally long lives then she would have seen that. She would have seen the rift between them, instead of the darkness of possibility.

“Did you know Jasper’s here?” he asked, the question coming out so casually that he could have been asking her if she thought the evening was unseasonably warm.

Alice nodded, “As soon as he decided to follow us,” she said.

She had barely been able to pick him up with her senses. He had been tracking them from a ways back, far enough away that he couldn’t hear their conversation, but close enough that if he was needed he could be on them within seconds.

“Does he really think I would hurt you?” Edward asked, sounding genuinely wounded.

“No,” Alice replied. “I think mostly he’s been trying to keep us civil,” she continued, smiling ruefully, “at the very least to keep us from dueling,” she continued, though she knew there was some truth in Edward’s question.

She didn’t think that Jasper really believed that Edward would hurt her, but he couldn’t be one-hundred percent sure of that, and the one percent chance that their talk could have turned into a confrontation which could have turned physical was enough to compel Jasper to follow, to protect her.

Edward stared off into the distance, possibly looking for Jasper, possibly thinking, Alice didn’t know which.

“It’s a nice night,” Edward said, still staring off into the distance.

“Yes,” Alice agreed, feeling very much like she did in the foyer earlier, waiting to see where he was going.

“I’ll leave you two to enjoy it,” he said. “You can come out now, I’m leaving,” he called in a louder tone, one he knew that Jasper would be able to hear.

There was a slight breeze, and then a few seconds later Jasper was standing beside Alice, his eyes regarding Edward calmly.

“I wouldn’t have touched her,” Edward said, needing to voice the sentiment, knowing that despite Alice’s words that Jasper was out there in part to protect his mate.

“It wasn’t personal,” Jasper said, holding Edward’s gaze. “She’s my lady.”

“Half of the time,” Edward muttered, the ugly feelings rising up in him before he felt himself begin to calm.

Jasper’s ability was much stronger now that he was closer, and not trying to mask the fact that he was manipulating their emotions.

“She’s still my lady,” Jasper said softly.

Edward nodded, exhaustion washing over him. He didn’t want to be talking about this anymore. Suddenly, he didn’t want to be anywhere close to either of them.

“Goodnight,” he said, planning on running as far as he could. He wasn’t even sure if he cared about making it back to town for school in the morning. All he knew was that he needed to really be alone for a while.

“Goodnight,” Jasper said, inclining his head respectfully in Edward’s direction.

“Night,” Alice said softly, her eyes on the mossy forest floor.

There was another ruffling of the air, and Edward was gone.

“Nice night for a walk,” Jasper commented a few moments later, turning from the spot where Edward had disappeared.

Alice stepped closer to him, allowing him to wrap his arms around her shoulders.

“Yeah,” she breathed out softly.

“Shall we?” he asked.

“Please,” she replied, easing up onto her tip-toes to press her lips against his cheek.

Jasper reached for her hand, and they began to head back in the direction of the house, their pace leisurely.

“Jazz,” Alice said softly, her voice cracking as their feet glided over the ground.

“I know,” he said squeezing her hand. “Things will be okay.”

Alice nodded, reassured, and they continued on their way home.

To be continued …

ATTN: I feel like I'm causing everyone panic attacks right now, so I just want to add a little note at the end here to say, there is much more to come in the story. The way things are set up right now, does not mean it is the way things are going to stay. Alice is awesome, but not every idea she comes up with is brilliant ;) Things have progressed really rapidly for them all, and they really haven’t had any time to think things through in any meaningful way. The story is not even halfway through, there is definitely much more to come so don’t worry! Don’t worry!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Why did he have to accept it? I wanted him to go away... And, nothing against Jasper, but him too. *grumbles* Well, I still enjoyed it. ^_^ Good stuff, as always.

I suppose we'll see how long his acceptance lasts once faced with the reality on a day-to-day basis...

Good point. He might go the way of the asshole, and be rejected by everyone. *crosses fingers for luck*

Stupid Edward...

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Teh Fuck???

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top notch :)

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I think I'm on my own here...

Edward

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