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fembuck ([personal profile] fembuck) wrote2009-03-30 05:07 pm
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The Hollows: I did it! I finished WWBC (and I only hate my life a little)

Okay, so at this point I think we all know what my feelings were about the first half of this book:




I'll admit it, the second half of the book is far less hateful than the first half ... of course, that is kind of like saying that I'd rather someone piss on my face than shit on it, but moving on ...

1. Rachel made a smart decision (for a while) and ...











I was shocked. This book should have come with a warning. I had to sit down for a while. I breathed into a paper bag for a good twenty-minutes. My mind was turned upside down. I looked at a picture of former U.S. President George W. Bush and thought he looked cute. I think I cried a little. My mother got a call that made no sense, and I think she's now very worried about me (the jokes on her if she tries to get the voices to stop talking to me! Because they're telling me to buy her Tim Horton's gift cards and flowers!).

Rachel said it was too risky to go to the party with Edden, and then she kept on refusing to go to the party with Edden, and then when she hung up, she had still not agreed to go to the party with Edden.



Of course, later on that back-down and sense that Rachel displayed, disappeared back off into the fairy wonderland it came from and Rachel once again started acting like a complete jackass and decided that it would be a good idea to fight banshee's in her bare-feet on New Year's.


You only get half for that shit, Cock Block!

Also was it just me or was Edden being a major douche in this scene (and then the rest of the book)?  I mean, putting Glenn back out in the field?  Wow.  Douche.

2. Ivy was in a good mood (and Rachel didn't manage to ruin it in like three seconds flat!) and being all sexy and shit and cracking jokes: Witness:

Will there be news vans and screaming? ... Count me in.
My mother always said I came from heaven.
You're a fun date. People look at you.




But, but, but, but ... THEN, Cock Block has to make Ivy all "Oh I feel so good, I look like a frickin' supermodel, and my roommate can't stop checking me out .... I HATE MY LIFE!" and, and, and, and ... THEN, Cock Block makes Ivy and Glenn dating, and Cock Block ...



This pairing actually doesn't inspire any hate in me, it just confuddles me something fierce! I mean, what? Why? Where? Huh? WHAT?

I think quizical baby expresses it best:


(No, I don't know this child. But this is what happens when you post children of your babies online. Crazy people put them in picture rants! Really, you should have seen this coming.)

Like, I said. I don't really hate this pairing. Ivy was really funny after gettin' her flirt on with Glenn, and I love me some funny Ivy so whatever I guess. Since we've got approximately eleventy billion more books to go, I can deal with Ravy getting closer while Ivy gets to be funny and happy for a while while she is dating Glenn (although, why he brings out the funny I have no idea). Ivy's (completely unnecessary) love interest is about a billijillion times better than fucking Pierce so, whatever I guess. My spirit is a little crushed. I just can't really care about these two, beyond hoping for more funny!ivy.

Speaking of fucking!Pierce ... FUCKING PIERCE! I HATE THIS MUTHAFUCKIN' PIECE OF RACHEL-CANDY! Really ...



3. This Rachel/Pierce fuckwittery cannot end soon enough. I dont' care what Cock Block is theoretically trying to do with him. I don't care about Every teenage girls Rachel Morgan's epic crush on Zac Efron Pierce, I don't care that she has been comparing everyone to Pierce and finding them lacking, or about how Rachel needs to get over her idealized version of love in order to find a flawed but real kind of love that can last.

I don't care because Cock Block has made Pierce an annoying little bastard! I'm not a New York Times best selling author, but I'm gonna go ahead and say that PIERCE IS SHITTY WRITING. SHITTY! (don't worry, I'm not going to post a picture for this one!) His dialogue is embarrassingly bad. It's like reading an eigth-graders play about Princess Gwendoliphina of Narwolk (and the Knight that loves her!) It is painful to read, and sometimes doesn't make sense. The way he speaks is SO over the top. I've read Jane Austen. I liked that shit. That bitch is good. This is NOT Jane Austen, Cock Block. Jane Austen is rolling over in her grave ... THIS IS WHAT YOU'VE CAUSED...



Just ... *sigh* Please just make him go away. Quickly. Usually it takes me a couple books to hate a character this much, I hated Pierce after his second word of dialogue. Just ... *sigh*

Cock Block, you have broken me like you are Hugo Weaving and I am Natalie Portman in the smash Hollywood hit V for Vendetta... the only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such...

4. The whole Kisten's killer thing was ...



I think [livejournal.com profile] trancer21 covered the 'meh' of this well here, so I'm not gonna bother because the meh of it all is paralyzing me with not caring at the moment.

I didn't hate Rachel torching the place or whatever, I just felt it was a bit ... I don't know ..



It was like an epic tantrum. I was far more moved by Ivy's quiet misery and rage. Rachel's response was a little too ...



...for me to handle.

I did like the hugging and the aura sharing, and the "I'll never let go" of that scene. But after a while, I was like "Goddam!" you know. It's like, Rachel, listen to Ivy ...


.

And now for that super awesome short section of this post ...

Okay, here goes ... THINGS I LIKED ABOUT WHITE WITCH, BLACK CURSE

1. The cover was very nice. I liked the picture.

2. As far as I can tell, all of the words were spelled correctly.



3.  There WERE some nice Ravy moments ...

-  I found it hilarious that a sign of Rachel's increasing love for Ivy is that she can smell her real good, but it is a pretty nice little factoid.

-  I liked that Rachel showed real concern for Ivy after Mia stripped her aura from her.  She was like worried about her and shit, which is a nice change from her Book 5 "Ivy must save herself" bullfuckery. 

-  The airport scene with the PSA Lesbians was nice.  I'm glad that Rachel has learned that gays are people too ...



...but the only reason she and Ivy can't be happy like that couple is because Rachel Cock Block, keeps cock-blocking like it's going out of style.  But yeah, it's fine Cock Block, I see that you've provided a whole paragraph of positive lesbian images (before turning the one actual lesbian in the book into a Jennifer Jason Leigh in Single White Female with bonus attempted voyeur rape action).  I won't call you a homophobe.  I honestly don't think you are (I'm being serious, I don't think she is!  Don't yell at me!).   You're just a cock-blocker ... who is afraid people might come after you ... and they might!



- I liked Rachel checking Ivy out hardcore after Ivy's night of binge drinking in the back of Cormel's Escalade (sounds kinda like vampire prom!)

- I liked Ivy and Rachel's pseudo-date, and Rachel being all, "Yeah, I'm with this hot bitch ...



- And of course, I liked the casual aura sharing.  Ivy is such a pimp.  She's all, "Oh, hey Rachel.  I didn't see you there.  How are you?  I like your hair, did you cut it?  Looks good.  We should totally catch up.  No, no seriously, we should totally catch up.  So, ah ... wanna share an aura?  We don't have to.  I'm just saying ... I'm here, you're here, black curses are giving me a tan, why not?

So, yeah.  Other than Rachel being all ...

+ =

It was a really good scene.

4.  It ended.

So, in conclusion I'm pretty sure there's tons of stuff I forgot to mention, that's how I feel.

*yawns*  *goes to take that nap*

*Warning: This post is image heavy*

Also, apropo of nothing ... is anyone watching Kings on NBC?  I'm loving it so far.  About 40% of that is because Susanna Thompson is rocks my world.  Another 30% is because Thomasina rocks my socks.  And the other 30% is for all of the other assorted awesomeness that makes up this show.  *wants people with whom to ramble about Kings*

pfgoihjwlke and KINGS!

[identity profile] pocabomba.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 02:21 am (UTC)(link)
Wow. This post was amazing. And I feel your pain. Thank you, by the way, for helping me decide to read this series, because despite the cock blockage - it is rather fun. And really, who hasn't dealt with a Rachel in real life. She's everywhere.

To my main point:

I LOVE KINGS. It's epic. And not epic fail (at least not yet). It's making me super happy with every episode, and the quality of each episode is not deteriorating which is monumental. So yes. Also, the women look good and aren't two dimensional. And there's the crazy (sorta gay) prince - you always need one of those you know. Big Love has one. This book I'm reading - The Yiddish Policeman's Union - has one. You just need a gay prince. I'm modifying my definition of prince to include first son to a prominent person, but you get it.

In conclusion, KINGS FTW (and you rock)!
Edited 2009-03-31 02:22 (UTC)

Re: pfgoihjwlke and KINGS!

[identity profile] fembuck.livejournal.com 2009-03-31 11:32 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you, by the way, for helping me decide to read this series, because despite the cock blockage - it is rather fun.

I wouldn't be ranting like this if I didn't like the series (at one point, and to some degree now even though that like is being tainted more and more rapidly). I say enjoy it (cause it's really really good at points) and then join the rest of us in Irritation Alley.

It's epic. And not epic fail (at least not yet).

:D

Also, the women look good and aren't two dimensional.

I know! Amazing. Wonderfully amazing. I feel bad for the Michelle actress because she's getting overshadowed acting wise by every other woman on the show, but at least the character is intelligent (and David is equally underwhelming in the acting department, so they fit well together).

And there's the crazy (sorta gay) prince - you always need one of those you know.

I really like Jack. I felt for him so much this episode, but I also wanted to slap him silly. I think Sebastian Stan is doing a fantastic job. Honestly, I didn't know he could really act. And Jack is totally falling for David, and is going to get SO burned.