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fembuckOh, Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightening Thief
... how you underwhelm me.
*le sigh*
Logan Lerman is too baby-faced for me to find him unf-worthy, so thank god the hot pieces of ass below were in the movie to keep me interested.
What I Liked
I enjoyed Melina Kanakaredes five seconds on screen as Athena. I could definitely buy her as the Goddess of Wisdom and war.
Uma Thurman rocked my socks. The Medusa scene might have been my favorite in the movie. Uma was chewing up the scenery like it was no fat, and flirting with everything in sight. It was awesome. Seriously, she was just a lot of fun to watch on screen and she had some very inappropriate but enjoyable chemistry with Alexandra Daddario and Logan Lerman.
Previous to this movie I'd only seen Logan Lerman in Gamer, which I liked him in, but I was still impressed with him here. The movie script really did him on favors, but I thought that he did quite well, and wished that the script had been better so that he wasn't trying to skate uphill for the whole movie.
Alexandra Daddario is fine as hell, and I liked that they let Annabeth fight and kickass. But, I really wished they'd let her show off her brains a bit more. I mean, if I hadn't read the books I would have thought that Annabeth was a daughter of Ares the way she was acting. Still ... pretty. Her eyes sometimes made me feel like she was stealing my soul though. My god, those things are intense.
Grover dancing to Poker Face at the Lotus Hotel was pretty goddamn funny. But even better was Annabeth grinding all up on some girl at the Lotus Hotel when they were high on flower cakes (yeah, you read that right). She looked so sad when Percy pulled her away, lol.
Like Pierce Bronsnan as Chiron. His hair was so luscious. I legit kept kind of laughing when he was in centaur form though.
Loved, loved, loved Jake Abel as Luke.
UNF. I was rather indifferent to Luke's charm in the books (though I did really like the bromance vibes he had with Percy in the first one), but Jake Abel was hot like fire in the movie. I did miss Luke's scar though. Like how you gon' have Luke with no scar, Chris Columbus? Boo.
Speaking of 'how you gon' do that?', let's move on the
section ...
What the FOCK???
How the hell was there no Kronos storyline??????????? I mean, seriously??? He's the big bad! It's like a Star Wars reboot with no Darth Vader! WTF??????
Why did Annabeth not have her baseball cap of invisibly and awesome!? Like the movie makers can go out of there way to make Poseidon the awesomest dad ever all of a sudden, but they're gonna make Athena a dead-beat who can't even spare time to give her kid a ball cap? Ugh.
How come Grover kicked ass instead of throwing tin cans at the bad guys?????
Why was there no Mr. D and his Peter Johnson jokes??????
Why was there no Clarisse???? It would have been really easy to just have her in the background in the camp scenes (especially at the flag match) and have someone casually mention her name.
Why was Annabeth fighting on the side of the Ares cabin?????????
Why was there no Ares? I love that jagweed.
Why did I only get like a split second glimpse of my bb Erica Cerra???? I wanted to see her in all her toga'd glory *cries*
Why did Annabeth not have a mad crush on Luke? Visually I would have really liked to see that since Jake and Alexandra are hot, and Annabeth and Luke appeared to be the same age.
Why was Hades so lame? I mean, shiiiiiit. No wonder Hades is so pissed all the time. He gets screwed in mythology and casting. Zeus gets Sean Bean, Poseidon is Kevin McKidd, and Hades is ... Steven Coogan? O_o
And I did not enjoy the retconning of the Gods. I kind of appreciated that they were such dicks in the books. Cause, well, they've always been dicks. Turning Poseidon into like the greatest dad ever that got ALL the gods banned from seeing their kids because he lurved Percy so much was irritating as hell. Oh sorry, best dad ever who built Percy a cabin all by himself with his bare hands even though he's a god whose realm covers 71% of the earth's surface?
And now that I'm done bitching ...
Percy Jackson and the Olympians (cam copy)
If you're interested, lol
Overall, it was honestly a pretty entertaining if uninspired movie. My friend who hasn't read the books really liked it, which leads me to believe the major source of my displeasure is how far the movie strayed from the storyline in the books. I mean, watching this was really like watching a Harry Potter movie where Voldemort didn't exist.
... how you underwhelm me.
*le sigh*
Logan Lerman is too baby-faced for me to find him unf-worthy, so thank god the hot pieces of ass below were in the movie to keep me interested.
What I Liked
I enjoyed Melina Kanakaredes five seconds on screen as Athena. I could definitely buy her as the Goddess of Wisdom and war.
Uma Thurman rocked my socks. The Medusa scene might have been my favorite in the movie. Uma was chewing up the scenery like it was no fat, and flirting with everything in sight. It was awesome. Seriously, she was just a lot of fun to watch on screen and she had some very inappropriate but enjoyable chemistry with Alexandra Daddario and Logan Lerman.
Previous to this movie I'd only seen Logan Lerman in Gamer, which I liked him in, but I was still impressed with him here. The movie script really did him on favors, but I thought that he did quite well, and wished that the script had been better so that he wasn't trying to skate uphill for the whole movie.
Alexandra Daddario is fine as hell, and I liked that they let Annabeth fight and kickass. But, I really wished they'd let her show off her brains a bit more. I mean, if I hadn't read the books I would have thought that Annabeth was a daughter of Ares the way she was acting. Still ... pretty. Her eyes sometimes made me feel like she was stealing my soul though. My god, those things are intense.
Grover dancing to Poker Face at the Lotus Hotel was pretty goddamn funny. But even better was Annabeth grinding all up on some girl at the Lotus Hotel when they were high on flower cakes (yeah, you read that right). She looked so sad when Percy pulled her away, lol.
Like Pierce Bronsnan as Chiron. His hair was so luscious. I legit kept kind of laughing when he was in centaur form though.
Loved, loved, loved Jake Abel as Luke.
UNF. I was rather indifferent to Luke's charm in the books (though I did really like the bromance vibes he had with Percy in the first one), but Jake Abel was hot like fire in the movie. I did miss Luke's scar though. Like how you gon' have Luke with no scar, Chris Columbus? Boo.
Speaking of 'how you gon' do that?', let's move on the
section ...
What the FOCK???
How the hell was there no Kronos storyline??????????? I mean, seriously??? He's the big bad! It's like a Star Wars reboot with no Darth Vader! WTF??????
Why did Annabeth not have her baseball cap of invisibly and awesome!? Like the movie makers can go out of there way to make Poseidon the awesomest dad ever all of a sudden, but they're gonna make Athena a dead-beat who can't even spare time to give her kid a ball cap? Ugh.
How come Grover kicked ass instead of throwing tin cans at the bad guys?????
Why was there no Mr. D and his Peter Johnson jokes??????
Why was there no Clarisse???? It would have been really easy to just have her in the background in the camp scenes (especially at the flag match) and have someone casually mention her name.
Why was Annabeth fighting on the side of the Ares cabin?????????
Why was there no Ares? I love that jagweed.
Why did I only get like a split second glimpse of my bb Erica Cerra???? I wanted to see her in all her toga'd glory *cries*
Why did Annabeth not have a mad crush on Luke? Visually I would have really liked to see that since Jake and Alexandra are hot, and Annabeth and Luke appeared to be the same age.
Why was Hades so lame? I mean, shiiiiiit. No wonder Hades is so pissed all the time. He gets screwed in mythology and casting. Zeus gets Sean Bean, Poseidon is Kevin McKidd, and Hades is ... Steven Coogan? O_o
And I did not enjoy the retconning of the Gods. I kind of appreciated that they were such dicks in the books. Cause, well, they've always been dicks. Turning Poseidon into like the greatest dad ever that got ALL the gods banned from seeing their kids because he lurved Percy so much was irritating as hell. Oh sorry, best dad ever who built Percy a cabin all by himself with his bare hands even though he's a god whose realm covers 71% of the earth's surface?
And now that I'm done bitching ...
Percy Jackson and the Olympians (cam copy)
If you're interested, lol
Overall, it was honestly a pretty entertaining if uninspired movie. My friend who hasn't read the books really liked it, which leads me to believe the major source of my displeasure is how far the movie strayed from the storyline in the books. I mean, watching this was really like watching a Harry Potter movie where Voldemort didn't exist.
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no subject
Date: 2010-02-18 03:37 am (UTC)SERIOUSLY re: Clarisse. There were a ton of scenes she could've actually been in and then we would've been spared the OOCness that was Annabeth in the first 20 mins. XD I mean, she's Percy's fucking bully anyway right?! It'd be like if they made the first Harry Potter movie without Draco in it!
I agree that Luke was pretty hot but... GOD I did not buy him as the 'guy everyone lurves because he's awesome and sweet and friendly.' He just seems like a smug asshole here! And...um, wow, if you didn't already know he was gonna be evil before his little speech in the cabin before he left... um, you do now. XD
I think it's bizarre that Colombus managed so stuff SO MUCH SHIT into the 2 hrs. 20 mins. of the first HP movie, but this one is only half-an-hour shorter and it feels like SO MUCH is glossed over. So many seriously important details/people were left out that it almost feels like he wasn't even sure it would BECOME a franchise, because how the hell are you going put that stuff in later, really.
And totally agree re: the Gods "restraining order" BS. Seriously, this is a generation that grew up with Harry Potter. Asshole parents aren't going to make ppls heads explode. XD
And oh what, no shout out to Rosario Dawson's hawt/awesome??? REALLY?? XD Considering how badly Hades got fucked up she at least redeemed that bit.
no subject
Date: 2010-02-18 04:50 pm (UTC)I will definitely go check that out.
re: Clarisse. There were a ton of scenes she could've actually been in and then we would've been spared the OOCness that was Annabeth in the first 20 mins. XD I mean, she's Percy's fucking bully anyway right?! It'd be like if they made the first Harry Potter movie without Draco in it!
Word to all this. Annabeth was unrecognizable as Annabeth at the beginning of the camp scenes. During that whole fight by the stream I was like O_o. I couldn't even enjoy hot chick kicking ass cause I was like, "WTF?!?!?!" It was just stupid. That whole scene was just weird.
So many seriously important details/people were left out that it almost feels like he wasn't even sure it would BECOME a franchise, because how the hell are you going put that stuff in later, really.
Yeah, I agree. But that's just dumb. It's like, why not be positive and set things up for a sequel instead of shooting yourself in the foot like they did here. I honestly have no idea who they would make another movie that fits with the series.
And oh what, no shout out to Rosario Dawson's hawt/awesome??? REALLY?? XD Considering how badly Hades got fucked up she at least redeemed that bit.
Rosario was fun to watch. I was just so irritated by the time her scene came on that I couldn't really enjoy it to the max. I had pretty much thrown my hands up in the air and given up on the movie at that point. But yeah, she was smokin'.