Fic: Tango in D Minor (Serena/Blair, Gossip Girl 1-3/?)

[fembuck]

Title: Tango in D Minor
Author: Janine
Fandom: Gossip Girl
Pairing: Serena/Blair
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I don’t own them.
Summary: Blair and Serena’s relationship continues to grow. Sequel to Audrey Can Wait and Here We Go

---

Part One

“Ugh!” Serena declared sweeping into Eric’s room, her face lighting up in a smile a moment later as she beamed at him. “Away with this!” she declared grinning, pushing his food tray away and dumping a crisp white paper bag on his lap. “I brought lunch,” she continued plopping onto the bed next to him.

“CocoLuxe?” Eric asked hopefully.

“Of course,” Serena responded reaching for the bag and opening it, wafting it in front of Eric’s face before he laughed and grabbed the bag from her, reaching inside.

“What about you?” Eric asked as he removed the contents of the bag and realized that there wasn’t enough food in it for both of them. “You don’t need to watch your figure,” he said looking over at her.

Serena laughed and flopped down on the mattress her torso by Eric’s feet as her legs dangled over the edge and kicked back and forth lazily.

“I had lunch with Blair,” Serena responded turning to face him. “She bought the Cinnamon Knot,” she continued nodding towards Eric’s desert before closing one of her eyes and extending her hand, pretending to pick up the pastry and poke it in his mouth.

Eric laughed and shook his head, glad to see his sister in such a good mood. She had been in a good mood a lot lately, which he greatly preferred to the melancholy air that had surrounded her when she first came back home.

“You’re in a good mood today,” Eric commented lightly as he unwrapped his sandwich, his eyes moving over to watch Serena.

“I am,” Serena agreed stretching a little. “Aren’t I usually?” she asked quirking an eyebrow at him.

“Well, yeah,” Eric replied in between bites. “It’s just that you seem … extra happy lately,” he went on watching her closely again. He thought he might have an idea why she was in such a good mood.

“Why,” Serena began pointedly staring at her little brother. “Are you looking at me like that?” she went on reaching out her hands as if she was going to tickle him, only to smile as he automatically pulled his feet back, hugging his sandwich to him and he eyed her wearily.

“Have you seen Dan lately?” Eric asked, surprised when a weary sigh emerged from his sister.

“No,” Serena replied finally shifting on the bed, restless. “We’re just friends.”

“He dumped you?” Eric asked surprised. On a completely aesthetic level he could admit that his sister was stunning, and he knew that boys (and men) were usually falling all over themselves to get even the tiniest bit of attention from her. It made him want to punch a lot of people in the face, but he liked Dan.

“We weren’t even going out,” Serena responded making a face as she looked at her brother. “Besides, if anyone did any dumping it was me.”

“Why?”

Serena had seemed to actually like him.

“It’s just not a good time,” Serena said sighing turning away from Eric to look out the window. “Besides things were always going wrong. It was probably like a sign from God or something.”

“I’m sure that’s what He spends his time doing,” Eric commented sarcastically, smiling as Serena stuck her tongue out at him.

“I guess you’ll have to take care of the Van der Woodsen/Humphrey love connection,” Serena teased, biting on her bottom lip as she looked over at Eric, releasing her lip and smiling when she saw him blush.

Eric opened his mouth to respond, but before he could get anything out Serena’s cell phone began to ring.

“Saved by the bell,” she muttered at him before reaching down for her oversized purse. “Yeah,” Serena said into her phone as she lay back down on the bed.

Eric shook his head. Their mother had most certainly taught them better manners than that.

“Hey,” Serena said a second later, her face lighting up as she grinned goofily up at the ceiling.

Eric’s eyebrow rose.

That was an extra happy smile if he had ever seen one.

“Yeah … totally … no, it’s fine. Really … really,” Serena said into the phone laughing airily, her feet kicking over the edge of the bed again. “He hasn’t eaten it yet. Yeah, I told him. I don’t know, I’ll ask him,” Serena said turning towards Eric who tried to pretend like he hadn’t been intently eavesdropping. “Do you …” she began speaking to Eric, “Why not?” she asked a second later talking into the phone once more. She was then silent for a moment listening to the other end before she started to laugh. “I’ll see you later,” she said a couple seconds after that. “Okay. Come on, stop it. Me too … me too! Okay, bye.”

“Who was that?” Eric asked, with what he hoped was complete nonchalance.

“Blair,” Serena responded dropping the phone onto the bedspread. “Being an idiot,” she added a moment later grinning before flipping onto her stomach. “I put some new songs on my Ipod. If you like them I’ll upload them onto yours and bring it back tomorrow,” she continued reaching over the edge of the bed to lug her purse onto it.

Eric shook his head. He could have sworn that was an extra happy conversation.

Oh well, maybe she really was just in a good mood and it had absolutely nothing to do with boys.

“Cool, what’ve you got?” Eric asked reaching for the earphone Serena was holding out to him.

---

Part Two

A Month Later

Serena breathed in deeply as she heard her mother’s voice ring out from the kitchen. Plastering a smile on her face she backtracked until she was standing in the doorway of the kitchen area.

“Yes?” she asked as pleasantly as she could muster.

“Where are you going?” Lily asked wiping her hands on a towel before her cool blue eyes focused intently on her daughter.

“To Blair’s,” Serena responded still smiling.

Blair had been right, after the Ostroff incident Lily had been quite unimpressed with her and rather critical of Serena when she and Blair had started to spend time together again. But, after Blair’s purging of the complimentary bar Lily had begun to warm up to the brunette again.

Serena hadn’t particularly wanted to have the conversation with her mother, but when Lily had found the bar empty the only way to avoid World War Three breaking out in the living room was to come clean.

The conversation had actually gone remarkably well, and Serena had to admit that she was rather surprised when Lily had looked hurt instead of smug and condescending when she told her about rehab.

When Serena finished telling her about how Blair had dumped all of the alcohol to preserve her ‘new leaf’, her mother had simply commented “at least there’s someone you trust with these things” and rubbed her arm lightly staring at her before sighing deeply and leaving the room to prepare for a dinner date.

“I feel like I should be paying Eleanor rent money since she seems to be putting you up these days,” Lily responded as Serena’s smile finally faltered.

“There’s no need to be so melodramatic,” Serena sighed. Eleanor would have had to have been around to be put out by her presence.

No, she and Blair had there own little domestic paradise during Eleanor’s frequent absences. Gabriella confined herself to the kitchen in the morning so she was often unaware of Serena’s presence in the house, and by the time she arrived in the evenings Gabriella had usually gone. It was quite a nice set up actually.

“Really?” Lily asked arching a perfectly sculpted, impossibly blonde eyebrow. “Can you even remember the last time you spent three consecutive nights here?”

“Can you?” Serena snapped before she could think better of it.

Lily’s eyes narrowed and for a second Serena was sure that she had just sassed herself out of a night with Blair.

“Watch it,” Lily said in a deadly calm voice.

“It’s just Blair,” Serena said in the most penitent tone she could muster. “We’re just going to be hanging out at her place. Really, it’s totally innocent. It’s not a big deal.”

“I don’t have a problem with you spending time with Blair,” Lily responded sighing softly, shifting to lean against the kitchen counter before returning her gaze to Serena. “It’s just that … you’re my daughter and I would like to see you every so often, perhaps even talk to you for more than five seconds as you fly out the door.”

Serena stared at her mother for a long moment taken back by the genuinely wistful look in Lily’s eyes. At times like that she thought that she was sometimes too hard on her mother. Lily wasn’t always the best at showing her affection but Serena knew that she did care.

“I’ll be home for the rest of the week,” Serena promised softly, smiling. “Maybe on Saturday we could do brunch or something. Catch up a little.”

Lily nodded then added, “Very well. Go play with Blair,” before waving towards the penthouse door, the small smile playing at the edges of her lips softening her words.

Serena grinned widely at that and stepped further into the kitchen. Walking over to her mother she then hugged Lily tightly and kissed her cheek before flying out the door.

Lily shook her head and sighed before smiling herself.

---

Part Three

Waldorf Brownstone

Serena moaned into the skin of Blair’s neck as her fingers trailed up the brunette’s nude torso roughly, her teeth nipping at the fair skin of Blair’s neck while her hand cupped Blair’s breast through her bra, massaging the full, soft mound.

“So warm,” Serena murmured into Blair’s ear, her lips moving to kiss the brunette’s cheek as Blair’s hand slid over her hips and over her ass, griping and squeezing. “You feel so good,” Serena groaned pushing back into Blair’s hands before pressing her hips forward, straddling Blair’s thigh as her own pressed into the heat at the apex of Blair’s legs.

Serena moaned as Blair gasped, covering the smaller girl’s lips with her own, breathing in Blair’s sigh of pleasure.

Blair’s panties were soaked. She could feel the damp slickness against her thigh and it made her head spin.

“You taste so good,” Serena said, her tongue flicking against Blair’s chin before she began to kiss her way down. “You smell so good,” she continued softly, raggedly as she buried her nose in the warm skin of Blair’s neck and breathed in deeply, nuzzling, burrowing into Blair.

However, a few moments later Serena pulled back from Blair’s skin, golden hair falling in front of her face as she stared down at the flushed and breathless brunette beneath her.

“You’re so beautiful,” Serena said softly, her eyes locked on Blair. “You break my heart.”

Blair’s lips parted at that as if she wanted to say something but no words came out. All she could do was take a shuddering breath, her body trembling beneath Serena’s and then she surged up, her hand moving to the back of Serena’s head, holding the blonde in place as she kissed her with a desperate hunger.

They kissed for long moments, Blair supporting herself on one arm while the other held Serena tightly to her ensuring that the blonde could not take her lips away from her – not that such a thought would ever have occurred to Serena. However, eventually the brunette’s arm gave out and she tumbled back down onto the mattress, Serena flowing down with her, her lips never leaving Blair’s.

Serena’s hand moved over Blair’s stomach slowly until her fingers brushed the waistband of the brunette’s panties, lingering there for a moment before they slipped underneath the fabric. A moment later, long, tapered fingers were sliding through the moist heat and neatly trimmed hair of Blair’s sex.

“Oh god,” Blair breathed out, her eyes shut tightly, her hand grasping at Serena’s forearm as her face contorted almost as if she were in pain.

Blair’s hips jerked, her thighs twitching slightly open before they then pressed together once more, trapping Serena’s hand awkwardly between her legs.

“B,” Serena said softly, the letter coming out of her mouth as a sigh moments later when Blair’s legs still hadn’t unclamped. “It’s okay,” Serena said blowing some hair out of her face. “I’m going to take my hand away,” she continued attempting to pull her hand out of Blair’s underwear.

A few seconds later the brunette’s legs unclamped and Serena was able to pull her hand free.

Ignoring the tantalizing wetness coating her fingers Serena flopped down onto her back on the mattress next to Blair, her eyes fluttering shut as she breathed in deeply and released the air she had taken in before repeating the process in an attempt to calm her body down. Once she felt able to think again, Serena turned her head to the side only to be greeted by Blair’s back.

The brunette had curled onto her side facing away from her.

“Hey,” Serena said twisting herself so that she was curled behind Blair’s back. “What’s wrong?”

“Oh nothing,” Blair responded her voice chocked as she turned her head into her pillow. “I’m just frigid, that’s all.”

“You’re not frigid,” Serena responded stroking Blair’s arm lightly, though she knew her tone sounded less than convincing. The truth was she was kind of bewildered by Blair’s behavior. She knew that Blair was attracted her, that she was sexually excited by her. When she’d had her hand in her panties Blair had been wet, wetter than she was most of the time when she touched herself. And the sounds Blair made when she touched her, the way her body responded to her touch all told Serena that Blair wanted her as much she wanted Blair. And yet …

“You could have at least tried to sound like you meant that,” Blair responded curling away from Serena even more, blinking back tears.

She knew that Serena wanted her, and the crazy thing was that even though she kept on stopping them from going all of the way, she wanted Serena too … badly. Even curling away from the blonde, completely mortified and filled with self-loathing, she could still feel the throbbing between her legs.

She wanted to do it, she just couldn’t let go, couldn’t relax completely. She mentally screamed at her body to relax and unclamp, she tried to will her thighs to part and allow Serena’s hand to explore her, but her body was traitorous and would not follow her commands.

Serena kept trying to tell her that it was okay and shifting with unfulfilled need the blonde would hold her and talk with her and laugh with her like nothing was the matter. But Blair knew that she was disappointing Serena, that the blonde was becoming increasingly frustrated with her inability to just do it. Serena denied it, but Blair knew. She knew.

The week before she had awoken in the middle of night and found that Serena was not lying beside her. She tried to go back to sleep, but she missed Serena’s presence in the bed and had gotten up and wandered down the hall to find her. Seeing a thin bar of light on the floor by the bathroom door she had walked over to the bathroom, a teasing smile on her lips when a sound from within stopped her in her tracks.

Serena was moaning behind the door and Blair could just detect a faint wet rubbing sound from within the room. Blair knew those moans she had heard them before in her bedroom, and on the couch. They were sounds Serena made when Blair’s lips were on her and her hands were under her clothes. After that there had been no doubt in Blair’s mind about what Serena was doing in the washroom.

And a few days before, as she made her way back to her bedroom from the shower before she had stopped just in front of her door to rub her towel over her face to remove some water droplets that were raining into her eyes from her hair. And when she did she heard the sound she’d heard the week before from within her room.

She had left the door slightly ajar when she went to the bathroom so Blair looked through the opening. Her bed was clearly visible and she could see Serena lying on her back, her legs drawn up and spread, her right hand moving furious beneath the blanket as she pressed Blair’s pillow to her face, her hand moving and her hips pumping until her body froze and she came shaking uncontrollably for a minute before collapsing against the mattress as she struggled for breath.

Blair was convinced. She was frigid. She was disappointing Serena like she disappointed everyone else.

She claimed her virginity as a badge of honor, but the truth was she could take no more credit for it than a snowball could take for being cold. She was totally pathetic and fucked up and couldn’t even let go around the one person she loved most in the world and who she knew loved her as well.

She was going to lose Serena. She was sure of it. She lost everyone.

She knew she wasn’t good enough, and she was proving it to herself and Serena over and over again. The blonde couldn’t be expected to put up with her forever.

“I meant it,” Serena said gently, wrapping her arm around Blair, bending her head down to kiss her shoulder. “I mean it. I just …” Serena began making sure to keep her hold on Blair. “I don’t understand exactly what … I mean, do you not want me …” Serena continued trailing off at as loss as to how to phrase the question. “We don’t have to, I mean if you don’t, if I’m doing something you don’t want …” she went on awkwardly.

“You’re not,” Blair said uncurling a bit, the trepidation and worry in Serena’s voice drawing her out of her own thoughts. “I do want you, I want this,” she said wanting to turn around to look at Serena but her emotions were still too raw for that. “It’s just still too much,” she continued softly. “Please don’t be mad.”

“Mad?” Serena repeated as if she had never heard the word before. “Blair, I’m not mad, there’s nothing to be mad about. You know you’re my favorite,” she continued before kissing Blair’s shoulder again. “Look at me,” Serena requested gently. “Please.”

Reluctantly Blair turned around in the circle of Serena’s arms until they were face to face. “It’s okay, I promise,” Serena said softly and then she leaned forward to kiss Blair’s lips, sighing contently as the brunette relaxed against her.

-

Blair turned her head to the side to look at the alarm clock and then looked towards the bedroom door. Serena was taking the longest shower known to man and they were going to be late for school if the blonde didn’t hurry up.

Sighing, Blair moved towards the bedroom door and pushed it open walking towards the bathroom. Fist balled up she lifted her hand to bang on the door and harass Serena until she got out of the shower. However, as she prepared to knock on the door she heard a faint moan come from behind the door along with the familiar sound of the shower.

Blair closed her eyes against the sting of tears that suddenly welled in them.

She knew it wasn’t okay.

To be continued ...

Comments

[novak_fan]

yay!!! you posted . Still I have to read it but I had to tell you that you already made my day *hugs screen* I was watching the Leighton/Chace interview on the Tyra's show right now and I think I felt more in love with Leighton if that is possible. She is SOOO cute!

Leighton really IS love

Review on your fic later ;)

[novak_fan]

Again another awesome job. But Blair! I want to hug her! It really broke my heart this thoughts she have about herself, how could you Blair-bear? I liked a lot the way you wrote that part, you can really feel her depression going on through her at the moment. So sad and heartbreaking. And also I love the Eric/Serena part, how Serena can't be still for a moment for the life of her and how "teen-in-love" she acted when she was talking to Blair over the phone. I was expecting her to be like " you hang up. Nop, you first. Come on, you.Ok, hang up!No, no, you first. Ok at my count...one, two three *silence* You didn't hang up!"LoL of course Eric was there and he was suspicious enough.

Thank you so much for this great series, I can't wait to the next update. I heard some good "preview" already ;) And please *puppy eyes* update soon. Remember that this week we don't have new episode and I'll really need my Waldsen dose.

[(Anonymous)]

One word to describe Serena and Blair... perfect. I don't know if you are a huge BAM or Spashley fan but these two are very quickly becoming the coolest couple on television. I can't help but love reading angst/love fanfic. Anways you rock! Enough said.

[sojourn-storm.livejournal.com]

I was thrilled to see that you're continuing this. It's truly so Blair to think she's a failure and that's she's going to lose Serena if she doesn't put out soon. I think that Serena should just show Blair what she does to her and the two can have a little voyeurism or something. But I guess that'd be too much to hope for. I hope Blair's not thinking once the deed's done that Serena will disappear. I liked the bit with Lily and Serena and how Serena hugged her in the end, I like the potential there. As usual this was fabulous and left me anxiously awaiting more from you. And kudos for the whole Eric and Serena scene. You nailed her whole restless-excited-super happy-I love my brother- Blair's calling-in love but trying to hide it thing. Superbly done. Thanks for posting.

[fembuck.livejournal.com]

I think that Serena should just show Blair what she does to her and the two can have a little voyeurism or something. But I guess that'd be too much to hope for.

*wonder twin powers activate!*

omg ... are you me? lol. I don't really want to spoil the next couple of chapters, but it's so awesome that you would write this because something like this totally happens and is like a really big moment for the two of them because Blair realizes how much Serena loves her to vulnerable like that and ... I'll stop talking now until the post, lol. So awesomely crazy that we had the same idea!

Thanks for the detailed feedback, I'm glad that your enjoying the latest installment. And they're definitely be more coming up with Serena and Lily and Serena and Eric sibling bonding!

[gespawcho.livejournal.com]

OK> I haven't read it yet but I will be back to comment (as if you could stop me). I just wanted to say how impressed I am that you posted this whilst I was talking your ear off!

[lettersandsodas.livejournal.com]

Awww, poor Blair. This was just heartbreaking, but also very exciting because I get super psyched when I see that you've posted a new GG fic. I can't wait for the next part because this one was wonderful! Thanks for writing.

[grdnofevrythng.livejournal.com]

and the conspiracy to kill me continues...

There needs to be more of this right now!

First, I love the whole van der Woodsen siblings scene. They are sibling love. Wait til he finds out it's Blair. I'm just excited for that.

It's nice to see Lily still being a mom. That was just a really sweet part. And yay for her warming up to Blair again.

Speaking of Blair, I'd just like to give her a big hug. Poor thing...though I must admit there's a perk to being able to watch Serena relieve her frustration. My God that's hot.

[gespawcho.livejournal.com]

Okay. I had to go collect myself after this one. That ending kind of snuck up on me and hurt my heart.

I loved Eric's wanting to punch the guys that drool over his sis.

I loooved this conversation.

“I’ll see you later,” she said a couple seconds after that. “Okay. Come on, stop it. Me too … me too! Okay, bye.”

So natural and you know Blair's all, tell me you love me, baby!

I loved the kitchen scene with Lily, and knowing that she found out about S's alcoholism, Blair's staunch support, and her hurt at knowing S didn't want to share it with her. And the "Go play with Blair" line. If she only knew.

...And, Serena thinking she'd sassed herself into a grounding. Nice to see that reality in the fic, of Lily actually being a parent even if we sometimes don't remember that's her actual job.

And finally. The entire third part just absolutely killed. It started off so hot and vivid. And then the reaction Serena had when Blair froze up. Just lying there and trying to collect herself.

And of course, somehow, I love Blair when she's insecure. It makes me hurt for her but it feels true. And her reaction when Serena sounded kind of insincere.

And the whole thing about Blair feeling like she can't fulfill Serena or keep her interested and happy. Oy vey. You got me in the heart and the stomach with that.

Love, love this series. Do you see another installment? Not that I'm pressuring...just curious because I love what you're doing.

[gespawcho.livejournal.com]

Shoot. Also, I meant to say. You know when Blair finally is ready, Serena is going to make it something she'll never forget. And S will have a crazy woman on her hands.

[theclosetalker.livejournal.com]

I love your take on Serena/Eric and Serena/Lily. I mean, it's very in character but goes a little deeper than what we've seen on the show so far. I loved Eric noticing how happy Serena was, and Lily warming up to Blair again.

Serena and Blair making out and groping was really hot. I almost thought they were going to do it and it took me a few seconds to realize Blair was stopping - I imagine Serena felt the same, lol. I love how much of an internal struggle it is for her, to the point where she resents her own virginity. And I loved Blair realizing that Serena has to get her satisfaction elsewhere - how heartbreaking for her to feel, again, like she's not enough.

[murasaki1200.livejournal.com]

Oh no! Angst is sneaking up on the Serena&Blair love bubble.

The scene between Eric and Serena is great. Could totally see Serena being super happy and open while talking to Blair, Eric noticing the extra shine in her radiance and pondering the cause.

It's nice to see Lily being a real mom. Kind of ironic that Lily needs to be a mom more than Serena seems to need a mom.

Poor Blair. She's still not feeling completely safe with Serena, presumably because of what happened with Nate and her Serena complex. So looking forward to the next installments!

[sinandmisery.livejournal.com]

I love this so, so much. It's so perfect and hot and heartbreaking...much like Waldsen is on the show.

The Eric/Serena part was great. I love how he just knew something was going on with her and assumed it was Dan. Plus, Serena's convo with Blair was uber adorable.

Serena/Lily was great, too. I could picture that playing out in one of the eps. I don't think Blair's going to be happy that Serena promised to stay home for a week, though.

And finally, Blair/Serena. I just don't even know what to say about that part. So much hotness and angst! Blair-bear, what does Serena have to do to show you it's okay to let go around her?? Blair's insecurities are just so heartbreaking and I can just picture her crestfallen face when she realizes what Serena is doing in the bathroom. You write the Waldsen so well!

*anxiously awaits the next part*

[sinandmisery.livejournal.com]

Oh and I forgot to mention that I, too, was thinking Serena should just show Blair exactly what it is she does to her. SO hot.

[oroborusfox.livejournal.com]

Yay! So good, as always.

You know, I haven't actually seen this show (it hasn't aired in Australia yet. Anyone know if/when it's going to?), but when I do I know I'm going to be like "Huh? Why aren't Blair and Serena making out? Who's that guy?" And that will make me sad.

... Maybe I should just stick to fic?

[crimsonwhisper.livejournal.com]

Wow how heartbreaking...I like how you have written Blair's inner conflict...oh boy...I <3 you...and them...they are so gaytastic.

[memorylapses.livejournal.com]

I squeed when I saw this in my friends page (watching gossipgirlslash)
this was so good, you pwn at Blair/Serena fics!
but why are you torturing me?! I need more. can't wait ;)

[anohara.livejournal.com]

This story is kind of rocking my world at the moment...

[kosmos8.livejournal.com]

Just wanted to express my love for this fic, and S/B, in general, and can't wait to see where you're taking them next.

[billy-rose.livejournal.com]

gah! stupid LJ, not alerting me to the postage! *kicks lj*
can't believe I didn't get an update for this kick ass post either *sigh*

anywho, AWESOME!
poor Blair though, feelin' that angst *sigh*
hopefully things'll work out for them

[queer-eulogy.livejournal.com]

Okay, so this definately has to be my new delicious pairing and you definately have to be the best at writing it. Seriously.

I loved your last two GG fics so much and was beyond happy to see that this was the sequel.

As basically everyone else has said, I loved the Eric/Serena scene. I think you captured them quite well and you most certainly captured Serena's giddy, hyperactive, I-love-my-Blair-bear-so-much attitude.

As for Blair's angst, so intact. She's always so doubtful, second guessing and comparing herself to Serena. In all your fics, you get Blair's state of mind down real well.

And I'm just dying to see where you'll be taking our girls next.

[clairels.livejournal.com]

Ahhhh angst pretty much? yeah lol Loved this chapter, poor Blair though I want to hug her :( Can't wait for the next chapter!

[thejadedrogue.livejournal.com]

I adore Blair in this fic for no reason besides how you've flawlessly written her :)

xoxo-jadedrogue
www.gossipgirlfansite.com (well worth checking out for crossposting fans)