...Best Damn Tapper! *Most Smartest*

So I've been reading my daily update over at What Would Tyler Durden Do? and had to pimp this blog because it makes me laugh until I cry. And then I wipe my eyes and laugh until I cry again. I don't know who this Brendan dude is, or what he does other than be awesome, but I love him and his commentaries.

So this is my everyone should read What Would Tyler Durden Do? post.

Examples of the gut busting funny ...

- Kirsten Dunst is exactly what an alien would be like if an alien came to earth and tried to blend in. They wouldn't know about our earth customs like tipping. Or dental care. This is why she doesn't tan, I bet. Her world has three suns and ours isn't strong enough for her cold clammy skin. I heard that one guy saw her eat a mouse one time. She just picked it up by it's tail and dropped it in her mouth whole. It was still alive and everything, kicking and squeaking. Swear to god, man.

- I guess these pictures of Brad Pitt on set with his daughter Shiloh could be cuter, but only if there was a baby tiger in a little jumper giving flowers to a baby panda in the background. And then the baby panda kinda blushed a little and then gave the baby tiger a kiss on the cheek. And then they went and played on the swings and held hands. Other than that, yeah this is pretty mush as cute as it gets.

- For some unknown reason, Glamour magazine is putting Drew Barrymore on its next cover and did whatever the hell this is for a photoshoot. It actually puts me in a sentimental mood because that bear kinda looks like a puppy I used to have. I actually found him. Poor little guy. He was just sitting there. In some kids yard. At the end of a leash. With a red bow around his neck and a tag that said "Happy Birthday Jack!" Whatever the hell that was supposed to mean. Where did he come from, how did he end up there, what fate did those monsters have in store for him? I guess we'll never know, thanks to me and my courage.

- Is there anyone in Hollywood more insufferable than Kirsten Dunst. I'll put it this way: No. She's so hideously ugly and annoying, if I were in a horrible car wreck and the car was on fire and I saw Kirsten running to help, I'd summon my last ounce of strength to lock the doors and turn up the radio.

( More Kirsten Dunst hate and assorted funny )

The prosecution rests ...