...Best Damn Tapper! *Most Smartest*

Okay, I'm sorry to do this to you all.  But I'm going freaking insane and I cannot control it for any longer.  I have reached my limit.  My limit, 'tis reached.  WWBC is killing me.  Kim Harrison (who shall henceforth only be referred to as Cock Block - or possibly Cock Block McGee - by me) is killing me.  *grabs hair and tugs and pulls*

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!  I've been patient.  We all have.  We have all been patient.  Six books is fucking patient.  But I CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE.  I'm like having actual physical symptoms due to the intense irritation and hateration (love you, Mary J!) Book 7 is inspiring in me.  

Now, I'm pretty sure that if you've read Book 7, you probably know the scene I got to, promptly threw my hands up in the air and was like all: 

( AW HELL NAW )

Yes, it is the scene where Rachel goes up to the belfry to get her demon book or whatever and Mr. I'm Fucking Irrelevant and Exist Only to Cock-Block volunteers to help her go look for it, because god forbid Rachel climb some stairs and carry a BOOK on her own. 

You know what happens in this scene, and I knew it was coming.  Really, I did.  We all knew it was coming the moment Mr. I'm Fucking Irrelevant and Exist Only to Cock-Block was invited to dinner, and we really knew it was coming when Robbie and Mr. I'm Fucking Irrelevant and Exist Only to Cock-Block got their bromance on over Alice's cobbler pie or whatever.  But even knowing that it was coming, I was not at all prepared for the reality of it ... or my reaction to it coming to pass.  It was just so much more horrible than ever before this time. 

I mean, Rachel/Crap for Brains ... aiight, whatevs.  I actually liked Nick in the first and second book, and found him constantly being referred to as Crap for Brains in the fourth book hilarious.  I dealt with it.  Rachel/Kisten ... Kisten was an alright dude, Ivy liked him, and he was a not so secret Ravy shipper.  Dude, also kept pressing for a threesome, which, you gotta respect.  If I was him, I'd try to bang Ivy again while dating Rachel too.  In fact I'd just watch them.  So Kisten, I could deal with.  I could probably even deal with Rachel/Mr. I'm Fucking Irrelevant and Exist Only to Cock-Block (if I skipped all of their scenes together, which I have been anyway, so HA!).  But I accidentally spoiled myself for what's gonna happen with Ivy and ...

( HOW ABOUT NO! )

Seriously, Cock Block.  WHY?  WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?  I'M A GOOD PERSON!  I PAY MY TAXES!  I LIKE PUPPIES AND KITTENS AND BROWN PAPER PACKAGES ALL TIED WITH STRING!  SO, WHY DO YOU HATE ME?!?!?!?!

*hyperventilates*  *breathes into a paper bag*  

I cannot pick up this book without my stomach clenching and a wave of exhaustion washing over me.  I just want to hide under a blanket and sleep until Cock Block makes the pain go away.  I literally have not been able to open the book in days!

( I've been trying to keep a lid on this admittedly insane reaction to a fictional book series and fictional characters, but crazy does what crazy wants when crazy wants to and my crazy is demanding to be let out. So, here is my Christian Bale inspired imaginary conversation with Cock Block McGee ... Note: cut for extreme profanity )

And ... I feel better now.

Once, again, I apologize for this bout of insanity, but I needed to get that off of my chest.